New Year…

I really don’t see the big deal over New Year’s Eve…time doesn’t pause, you don’t really get to start over so why does everyone act like this year is going to be THE year? This year may be better than last year, but it depends on what happens in your life. There really isn’t such thing as a brand new start…you still carry your past with you. But I guess it gives people a good excuse to go out and party.

With that being said, I found myself looking back over the past year and thinking of things I would like to do differently. I am not a fan of resolultions, as I think we can choose to change habits whenever but I found myself deciding that today would be a good day to commit to writing at least one blog a week. All the other resolutions – I have been implementing as I soul searched. My Dad died in October and that led to an epiphany moment, since I hadn’t lost anyone close to me in ohhh 15 years and I was so young I don’t remember much of it. Back to my epiphany – life is short. There is no guarantee that tomorrow will arrive. So I slowed down, opened up more, appreciated people more and made sure they knew I appreciated them.  Life has no guarantees. People die too soon. Opportunities pass you by. Sometimes you don’t get a second chance. So my advice is to slow down, appreciate the people and things you have in your life, and if you don’t like something, change it. You are in the driver’s seat, so take it off cruise control and choose where you want to go.

Once upon a time…

Once upon a time…I believed in fairy tales and happy ever afters.

I believed in Prince Charming and glass slippers.

Now, I know the truth. There is no such thing.

I used to believe in fairy godmothers, and kisses breaking spells.

I dreamed of a man to whisk me away and treat me like a princess.

Now, I know better. It’s not gonna happen.

I used to believe that frogs could turn into princes, and

That mermaids really existed.

Now, I know it was all a fantasy.

There is no such thing as magic or dreams coming true.

I used to believe in magic mirrors, and talking mice too.

Now, I know it was foolish hopes.

You see – I thought Prince Charming existed.

Turns out it was all a lie.

I used to believe that pumpkins turned into carriages,

And Never, Never Land was just around the corner.

Now, I know better. Hearts break, and dreams die.

I used to believe that a monster could really be a prince in disguise,

And that genies lived in oil lamps. I used to believe in love too.

Now I know better. They are stories spun for children.

So I am shelving the fairy tales and leaving my “Once upon a time” behind.

Broken

Love. It’s a tricky thing. You trust him to hold onto your heart and protect it. Then one day, he no longer wants it and tosses it back to you – bruised and scarred. It wasn’t supposed to be this way. How did this happen? I think saying goodbye may be one of the hardest things to do – especially when all you want to do is say hello. But if he’s moved on, all I can do is let go. Smile though the tears and wish him luck. No point yelling or begging. No point upsetting him when he seems so happy. Love can sometimes be letting go. So I kiss my dreams goodbye and try not to let him see me cry, as I die inside.

Romance Authors

I have a confession; I love my romance stories. I am addicted to Julie Garwood’s historical romance, Nora Roberts, Julia Quinn, Stephanie Laurens and Lisa Jackson (I would’ve thought most of hers were mystery apparently not).  I just love sitting outside and being sucked back in time to life in the ton.  Even though they tend to have have similar plots, the characters make the stories so real and so enjoyable.  I like reading these books when I need a break from some of the “heavier” books I may be reading. Does anyone have any suggestions for other authors I should try; it doesn’t matter if they are historical or modern. I am just desperate for new books as my authors don’t write as fast as I read. Thanks! 🙂

Curling up with some classics

A friend and I have decided to challenge ourselves to read or reread several classics in the next year. I love the classics and escaping to different time periods.  I remember how much I dreaded some of the classics in English and now find myself reading them for pleasure. LOL. If anyone has any recommendations to add to my short list, I am eager for feedback. Thanks!

Read:

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen (I love all of her books but this is my favorite)

Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte

Dracula by Bram Stoker

Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorn

To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee

Currently Reading

I have just started Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy.

Wanting to Read:

Brave New World by Aldous Huxley

Animal Farm by George Orwell

Frankenstein by Mary Shelly

Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck

Great Expectations by Charles Dickens

My Antonia by Willa Cather

The Picture of Dorian Grey by Oscar Wilde

Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway

1984 by George Orwell

Catch-22 by Joseph Heller

Beowulf

Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer

My love affair…with books

 I have had a lifelong love affair with books – all kinds of books, from memoirs, biographies, historical fiction, and romance to classics.  I can’t recall not reading.  I remember Dr. Seuss, Nancy Drew, Margaret Thatcher, Clive Cussler, Jane Austen, Harper Lee and countless others.  I remember Sunday afternoons, curling up on the couch nearest the fireplace, with my nose stuck in a book, while my Father watched football.  Reading was and still is my escape – it can provide with adventure or solace.  Books have provided me with knowledge and comfort.  I have a tendency to relate current going ons in my life to stories I’ve read.  I’ve noticed that when I’m feeling a bit homesick, I turn to the books that remind me of home – the Harry Potter books my brothers and I read together, or To Kill a Mockingbird (which I own at least 4 copies of).  I’ve found that when I go through a really bad breakup, I pick up Wuthering Heights (misery loves company?). I love opening up a new book and delving into a new story, but I also love rereading old ones.  I feel like I learn something new even when I’m rereading.  I hate coming to the end of a book; sometimes I feel as though I have lost a friend. Do any of you find yourselves reaching for “comfort” books, and if so which ones?

Blessed

I am just sitting here thinking about how blessed I am. A lot of my friends have been laid off due to the economy and I find myself whining about going to my job, when in all reality, I am lucky to be “safe” from layoffs. Some of my friends spent 8 months filing out application after application, before finally getting a job offer.  They couldnt afford to be picky and took the first job that came their way.  I feel so ingrateful for complaining when I should be thanking God for what I have. I hope the economy picks up soon – my thoughts and prayers are with those struggling to make ends meet and find a job.

Genocide

“Genocide: the deliberate and systematic destruction of a racial, political, or cultural group.”

            I just finished reading “First They Killed My Father” which is a memoir about the Cambodian Civil War.  I had heard of it but never in much detail.  The author, Loung Ung, remembers the fear, starvation, torture and child soldiers in such vivid detail that it broke my heart.  I cannot begin to imagine the terror a child feels as she watches soldiers take her Father away…never to be seen again.  The civil war raged from 1975-1799 and roughly 2 million Cambodians died from starvation, torture, disease, labor and execution.  2 million out of 7 million people exterminated by hate. Loung Ung tells her story in the voice of the 5-year-old child she was when the war began.  We see her fear, guilt, anger, courage and hatred as she struggles to survive in a land torn to pieces.  I am amazed that despite what she witnessed, she overcame the horror and became an advocate for the Campaign for a Landmine Free World and for the Abused Women’s Advocacy Project of the Maine Coalition against Domestic Violence.  Instead of allowing her experience to consume her she has embraced it to better the world and has proven that she is not merely a survivor but a warrior.

            I am always horrified by how long these mass killings continue before someone steps in.  We always hear about the Jewish concentration camps but let’s not forget the genocide in Cambodia, Bosnia, and many others, including the most recent one in Darfur and Rwanda.  How long will the world standby and allow this to happen?  I realize that we cannot prevent every war but we continually wait years before attempting to intervene, if we do at all.  We just look the other way and pretend that millions of people aren’t being slaughtered because of their racial, political and cultural roots. The world – the U.N. must stop being complacent and starting protecting those who cannot protect themselves.  Words are not enough.  We cannot condemn the actions of a government and continue to let them get away with their killings; we must enforce our words with actions!